When people wince at the idea of a blog its my most recent blog that they are thinking of. Hates Job, Hates Life, Writes Blogs. But so what if my life runs parallel with the masses? At least its true, or as true as I can muster. Muster is a stange word though. Too close to mustard.

Started reading James Frey's My Friend Leonard. He writes this one without many commas or paragraph indentations, so it feeling like my mind is running a marathon. Not the funnest read but oddly enjoyable. Today I rewatched "Broken Flowers", still think it drags and is boring, and also "Hudsucker Proxy", which is quintessential Coen Bros - both with Emily. We ate sushi for lunch which I absolutely loved at first, no joke. Than I though about what I was swallowing, really thought about what was going down my throat and I stopped. Just stopped eating it and couldn't imagine another bite. Sushi is so weird, and you're a virgin angel. Emily and I started to watch "The Minus Man" with Owen Wilson and Janneane Garrofalo (however it's spelled), but turned it off scoffing. Man, is it crap. It was made for tv, but not even good tv - more like its 5 AM, what should we air? Apparently Dwight Yokoam is in it, but we didn't make it that far. Heck, we didn't even see Garofalo. Shucks.

So I was thinking, why am I so pessimistic all the time? So little confidence. A real, negative outlook. O Patrick, how thoughtful. And I realized... yeah, I don't know. Guess I was born that way. I guess if I wasn't with Emily I would not be able to find a girl. All girls want is confidence and courage. It's so boring. "And all guys want is sex, duh." Yeah Yeah. It's still pretty boring. What's there to be courageous about? Or have confidence about? So, it's got to be an act. Anyway, I'm glad I have Emily, but sorry she has to put up with my negativity. And half-sorry, because I'm an asshole, that girls care about confidence in the first place.

Girls want this guy who is like, "Duh, I can do anything, here are your flowers, and here is your ring, duh, I can do anything." And then, all of the sudden, he loses his job because he slept with everybody in the store, yeah, EVERYONE. And the girl is like, "DUH, what do I do?" And he's saying "I can fix it, where are my tools, aarugghhh." And she's like, "We never have sex anymore, I'm on my period, let's go shopping, you never want to go shopping." "But I have to take a dump for a half hour and sleep with this girl I just saw, and you never fellate me like she does." "Weh Weh I'm a big baby, what am I doing on earth, I'm a baby." "Teach me how to shop." "I'm going home, GAWD!"

hmmmm...

Food for thought, I guess. Food for thought. Incidentally, I do not know any girl who fits into anything I just said. One of those girls is asleep in the room behind me. I think I will go cuddle.