HYPERION

I've decided two things: Firstly, I want to see the world's tallest tree. Her name is Hyperion and she is 378.1 feet tall. Biology doesn't even know what to do with a tree like that. Biologists are talking amongst themselves, saying: "How does this Hyperion get water to its uppermosts?" Others are adding, "Yes, what about gravity?" "Oh yes," they are saying, "Gravitas, precisely." Secondly, I have also decided that if a 378.1 foot tall tree does nothing for you, if it doesn't stop and make you think about how big and scary a tree that height is, then I do not like you.

End of story.